just a kid

He'll be 1 in a month. His first year of potentially so many. I had a birthday last month. A fairly significant one, I think. People who, a few weeks before seemed so much older are now suddenly "my age". I like being 30 so far...more than I thought I would. I know technically it isn't really that much different from 29, but somehow, it feels different. I've been telling the girls in the high school small group I lead that once you turn 18, you sort of feel 18 forever. I know I do, on the inside anyway. Sometimes I look at my 3 kids and my house and my husband and I sort of giggle to myself and think "Don't people know? How could they let me bring these babies home from the hospital? I'm just a kid!" But I'm not just a kid. And sometimes that is sad to realize, but mostly lately, I'm thankful for these 30 years that I wear on my face and speak in my words. I feel a bit more real and more secure. One thing I've learned for sure is I sure have a lot to learn.