Speaking of making space, I am trying to de-clutter because I can't find my iPod and we have too much stuff and I think Simple Mom is cool.
The following items are standing in my way.
- One special edition pop-out map of Atlanta. It fits in my pocket! Granted I haven't been to Atlanta in over 3 years and I don't have plans to go. But when I do go, how cool would it be to have a special edition pop-out map?!
- teeny tiny earrings that I'll never wear but my MIL told me not to sell at a yard sale because she bought them for me and well, they're real. Don't ask me what kind of real because I don't know. But it basically means I can't donate them, sell them or throw them away.
- two small, momma/child figurines brought straight from the home of The Man's very healthy and delightful 95-year-old grandmother who has been getting rid of things for the past 10 years because she believes she will surely die soon but she "just keeps breathing!" (her words not mine). (hence the quotes).
Four boxes filled with everything from our totaled car. It was towed from the scene of the accident to a lot out of town so they had to ship all of our things to us. I was all put out because we hadn't gotten our things out earlier and it was so inconvenient to have to wait for our things and when is it all gonna get here anyway? I need my things!
Here they are. Here are my things. My very important, can't-live-without-you - things. Can I begin to explain to you how discouraging it is to get a box of trash in the mail? How about FOUR BOXES OF TRASH? Seriously, did I drive around with all this trash in my car all the time? Am I a person? Because I'm seriously beginning to wonder if I have whiskers and a really long tail.Nothing says "de-clutter" like having FedEx back their ginormous truck into your driveway and deliver four boxes of your very important trash. At least it was easy to throw all that away. But what to do with the pop-out map of Atlanta?
41 comments:
Okay, I just cleaned out my car this weekend (lets remember it is November) from our 3,000 mile (no, that was NOT an exaggeration) road trip home this summer which took place in September. I have been driving around in THE most nasty thing in the world for two whole months!! I think my car was a health hazard! I found in my car that EXACT fake, plastic piece of bread that is in your picture (among many other things). The sad part is what motivated me to clean was NOT the fact that there were months of snacks caked to the seat of the car, but the fact that we have lost a library book that I have now had to pay late dues on but still can't find, and no, it wasn't in the car!!
Is it like the pop out map of England from Friends? I just have to know!!
And I am cracking up at four boxes of can't live without it trash! Sounds like my van!
The empty chip bag is invaluable. I hope they insured those boxes very well.
Ok, that's pretty funny. Only b/c that's about what my trunk looks like. Sad.
I'm like that with my bag/purse. It's so big so I just toss stuff into it all day. Then suddenly I find that I am carrying around a bag of trash! I'm pretty sure if I dumped it out on the floor right now it would look remarkably like your pile of invaluable car trash...CD, headband and all.
All this means is that you are a normal human mom of 3. I make the kids do a trash pick up everytime we are at the gas pump. While the gas is pumping, they collect all the trash, wrappers, empty cups, etc and put them on the drivers seat. Before I get in the car, I throw it all in the trash can there at the gas station. I also keep a small rubbermaid bin in the car for travel games/toys to keep them put away. When we get out of the car, they have to collect the games and put them away. We also don't go into the house empty handed. These 3 habits have helped us at least a little.
I am so sorry about your car, but thank you for sharing with us. I feel better knowing that I'm not the only "squirrel" on the road. The last time I cleaned out our truck was due to sheer embarrasment. I went to pick the kids up from school, and they are accompanied to our vehicle by a school employee. They opened the door to let them in, and some empty wrappers and about half a box of Nerds fell onto her shoes. What a mamma.
I am so laughing at this!
Save the earrings for the girls. Then if they lose them--it won't be that big of a deal
Oh Emily,
Please tell me you looked through the trash boxes for your Ipod. I was found mine between my girls' carseats with a 3 month old bag of McDonalds fries. My point....they used to like to steal my Ipod.....until they witnessed the raging temper tantrum I threw about not being able to find it.
And listen, don't feel bad, they'd have to send a U-Haul to bring me back the junk from my SUV.
This post is hilarious!
sorry about your ipod but you'll be pleased to know that my van would be exactly the same way. in fact.
btw, is that a croissant?
Oh now I feel better about what is in MY car. I didn't realize your car was totalled--wrecks are so scary!
I adore you and your trash. I live in constant fear that I'll have to give someone an unexpected ride in my van and everyone will discover that secretly I am a hoarding slob.
I've got my story all planned. I loaned my van to my niece yesterday so she could drive some teammates to a field hockey tournament. Those girls are slobs! I can't believe they ate teddy grahams and Scooby Doo fruit snacks the whole way to the game!
I think all that stuff is in my car also! :(
Oh my word girl. That is sad that you had 4 boxes of trash, but even sadder that Fed Ex paid to have that shipped back to you. I guess they couldn't just throw it away or anything with out your permission. At least you can recycle their boxes!
Can't wait to see you on Saturday!
You're making me feel so much better about my car. Thanks, that was nice of you. ;)
Ok, my car has the same load of junk in it and my husband chastises me every time he gets into my car that I need to clean it up already.
Glad to see I am not the only one!
I'm cracking up at the crescent roll. I just had to enlarge the pic to see more! I have a chicken leg in my back seat, we never leave home without it -- compliments of the Baby Girl :)
I see many familier things in that picture! I can't imagine how many little slips of paper with directions are on the floor of the car! I guess it's like when your mom tells you to always wear clean underwear in case you get in an accident... but in a car version :) I would be embarrased at how many starbucks receipts and tampons and hair clips would be boxed up nd sent to me! Seriously, why do I have enough tampons for the entire country in my car?
That was hilarious!!!
The pop out map might make really cool wrapping paper...
ROTFLMHO! This is I think the single most hysterical post I have ever read in blogland.
Is this what therapists call a "break through?"
I hate clutter. But I am the opposite extreme which gets me in trouble in other ways.
Everything in moderation. God knows us so well!
I bet your girls are happy to have their plastic crescent roll back! I'm sure that was missed the most. If you ever participate in a car scavenger hunt, that stuff could be valuable!
You have lived my worst nightmare. Having someone else have to clean out my van and than actually mail it all to me!!! But thanks for letting the rest of us messy car mom's not feel so alone. I think I'm going to send my hubby a link to this post, so I can prove I'm not the only one!!
Thanks for being so real.
Oh my goodness! I just found your blog tonight and usually lurk for awhile before I comment, but I could NOT help myself, LOL.
I, too, have a teeny-tiny pair of earrings from my MIL. She told me when I opened them, "They're *real* diamonds! If you call that number on that tag, they'll verify it." Oh my goodness. Hardly.
Anyway, I added you to my blogroll b/c you seem just delightful. :)
I am still waiting to hear your take on Twilight. I haven't read, but I know so many of my students have and I amy dying to hear what you think :)
Is that a plastic croissant roll I see in that pile? Um, I just cleaned out my car that I affectionately call the "French Fry-Mobile" and found a plastic croissant roll in the mix. What's up with that? Weird!
Oh my...I can't even begin to comment about trash.
LOL about the boxes of trash!! What a "reality" check that was, huh?! Isn't it funy how important we imagine our "stuff" to be. I am so there with you - glad you can't see into this room where I sit amidst all the junk I don't know what to do with! ;{ I have said I wish I could just throw the whole room into the trash and start fresh, but there are a FEW important things in here...
Somewhere.
Can't tell you how much I just laughed! Thanks for brightening my day.
I've been looking around our apartment with new eyes lately and thinking/seeing how much un-needed stuff we have! I consider myself more of a minimalist too, so what does that say about me!
Depending on the size of the map, you could frame it and hang it somewhere cool...and if you really end up needing it, just pull it out of the frame. If it's small enough, you could put it in your glove box (if it's not cluttered). You keep me laughing every time I read! Love it!
~audrey
It hinkk those three items are probably going not going to clutter your house much! Like you said they are all small. Just keep the map in your pocket all of the time! That's so funny about having trash shipped to you!
That they sent you EVERY last paper and plastic croissant...oh my! I'm laughing and crying at the same time. I know what that feels like--to feel like you're sometimes being "eaten" by your stuff----and yet the second you get rid of something, you (or your kids) need and/ or want it.
Use your map of Atlanta to fold a neat little paper box to store those earrings in that you can never give away.
Can you imagine what the people who boxed your oh-so-important stuff were thinking as they boxed it? That's funny. And depressing as the state of the inside of my van just came to mind. It smells like dog. We don't have one. It's from letting my cousin's dog ride with us two months ago. (yes I'm sick) Lets just say she tried to clean the window with her tongue (of course!) and had lots of, well, flatulence. I didn't know if I'd ever smell clean air again--if the smell would leave my nostrils, that is.
I have the guilt complex about getting rid of things people have given me. Things that I knew as soon as they were given, I would have to calculate how long I'd have to politly keep said items before donating them somewhere else. Don't get me started on the things I think I'll need later. ACK. I need professional help and I hope Oprah doesn't find me first. Unless it's for a makeover. (Does she do those, or do I have to petition for Tyra's show?) Maybe if I'd quit watching TV and blogging and just. take. a. shower. That couldn't hurt.
Oh, and apparently I have some critical grocery shopping to do--am I the only mom without a plastic croissant? I feel so uncool. Like I totally failed Mom Skoul.
this made me laugh and laugh, especially because we would have totally gotten 4 boxes of trash too. You should see our van right now!
I love you Emily because I have the same issues at my house. I peer at your sisters house and I do not see "clutter" My house has Clutter....and I want to toss it all. But I have a naggng feeling I might "need" it like your map of Atlanta.
I cleaned out my car and now I have 3 canvas bags of stuff from my car in my living room.....ARG
I have a pack of "Angel cards" cards with religious sayings on them that came FREE in something my husband ordered....But we never asked for these cards with odd passages...do i toss them? it seems like a waste but what do I do with them? Drop them where?
You are hilarious! Yes, you and most other moms drive around with that much ridiculous stuff in their cars!! Shame on us! I have the same problems decluttering! I don't know what to do with children's art (especially the things they made for me on Mother's Day, Valentine's Day, etc.), the sliding glass door lock thing that my police officer cousin gave me 20 years ago (I don't have a sliding glass door but I might some day, right?), and the broken blue and white plate that I may some day morar and grout onto a flower pot. What to do?
This is hysterical! LOVE the pop-out maps! Must save!
I am laughing out loud so hard right now...I hope I don't wake up my son!!! There are a couple of reasons I'm laughing, the main being my car would be so much worse!! I don't throw away "stuff", like coupons, etc. b/c I think eventually I'll use them. However I never do and it ends up being an entire trash bag full of garbage taken out of my car! And second, I can imagine seeing the Fedex truck, and me getting all giddy b/c I have a package, only to open 4 boxes of my own stuff!!!! LOL
Every time we travel over to Alabama to see my family, my dad always asks me when am I going to clean out my car. But on long trips is when it's the worse!!!
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